Almost There

As of today, I have 100% of my support pledged, my airfare itinerary drawn up, and 47 days to go until I leave. (That means I leave June 24th.)
It's a satisfied feeling, watching God accomplish something big (like raising $2,000 in one month). Now, there's a calm before the storm. I have time to think about what this means. I have time to get scared of leaving everyone and going to where I know no one. I have time to think about how the Kenyans who live in Kibera have lived lives that I don't know about. I have time to already begin to miss being there for Rob's big races. I have time to get excited about fulfilling one of my life's biggest goals. I have time to worry about what to pack, what to leave behind. I have time to stare at my engagement ring for a little while longer until I leave it in the States. I have time to learn more Swahili. I have time to try some East African food before I have no choice but to eat East African food. I have time to pray.
This is the time that I want to be on my knees, talking to the only One who is going with me. God is simply the One that I must focus on now most of all. As much as I love my nieces, or my friends, or my fiance, I must love God more. In this time left, I have time to talk myself out of this, to remember that I am pushing aside work, money, home, marriage, all for this place that I've never gone to, to minister to people I never met. I could say, no, nevermind, it doesn't make sense after all. But I must love God more than anything else, and want to forgo it all for His sake.
My God has plans for me. Plans to prosper me, and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future.
I have 47 days' worth of time...